Yesterday was a fun nite with jojo they all and we were enjoying ourself hmm ...
but due to to my mood was so down i have no choice but to put on a mask to
get high and join in the fun .
alright am not gonna make it draggy anymore ...
make it straight to the point which i wanted to speak .
Am moving out soon , real soon ... staying alone ... i donnoe what to do
yah though i have been independent since 13 year old i thought that
i can adapt to the life of independent , yea indeed i have make it but
i fail to one thing that ish staying alone on other flat ...
we left we no choice , but to move out and stay on our own ...
have already been seperate from dad and become a broken family
and left we the 4 of us Me , Mum , and my two sis ... and i have been
trying my beri hard to hold on to this family but what the point of me
and my mum holding on where the rest of them don give a damn
and jus hack care . Expect their life to be some Luxury life . and in the
end suffer ish me and my mum ... am holding a freaking 420 pay not
4200 pay !!! get this right after paying my bill i left not much to help
and GREAT ! now we have to stay our own move out and stay in a room
with no KINS , no FRIEND , and staying with STRANGERS ... really thanks
you guys alot for making the situation becoming like that . I have give up
am exhausted super tired of explaining everything , rushing u guys to do this
and that , am tired of putting mask whenever am out of the house ...
the mask of fake smile where i don actually have to show out but i have
no choice ... but i have been telling myself that no matter what i still have to be
strong ... that the spirit that falls in me , i do cry but no infront of friends so am
not actually that strong cause afterall am still human , am not a robot ...
hence , when can all this bad luck stop falling on me , i cant take it anymore luh
currently am still rushing to find work and room jus to support for myself ...
Haiz what to do ? even though it really hearts break to see this and am really super
down but i still have to move on cause life still goes on ... every obstacles make me
grow stronger but i don really know i can hold on till when ... i tink let jus let the natural
take its own course bah ... i don wanna predict and don even dare to tink about anything
am scare to face the fact perharps :(
ARGHHHHHHH~~~~~~~~~~~ i need a break , i need a long rest , a long long rest so that
i can don need to think so much ... I noe what i said ish all rubbish cause how can i probably
take long rest where thing already reaching the verge ... sadistic right haiz but i still believe
that am gonna make thru this obstacles ... TRUST ME ! TRUST ETHAN ! everything gonna turns out to be fine one day :) jia you bah
WORK HARDER ETHAN CHAN !!!
From : Ethan Chan
I hope i can close my eye
forever so that i don need
to wake up and face the scary
reality haiz .... am gonna out of
breath one day jus one fine day ...
Hope that thing will turns well soon :(
Yesterday was a fun nite with jojo they all and we were enjoying ourself hmm ...
